A PRODUCTIVE STRUGGLE
“Thank you, Mrs. Bolden, for everything”, NL said, handing me a box of chocolates.
I smiled and thanked him.
NL is a nice, hard-working young man. He has a good work ethic, is very well-mannered and an overall joy to teach. But his parents have been somewhat concerned because he was not an A student in Calculus. They have requested a parent conference, asked if he could have extra time on test (which I immediately denied), and I was told they were grade grubbing in another STEM course.
So when NL thanked me, I said, “I know this year has been difficult for you but I appreciate how hard you worked.”
He admitted his struggles. You see, in the past he had always scored in the high nineties in all of his courses and was usually the smartest kid in the room. That was not the case this year. This year had been humbling for him and especially for his parents.
When his parents saw him struggling, they wanted to “fix it.” They wanted to blame. They wanted to make it easy for him to get the high nineties.
But NL saw the value in his struggle. Sure, he was humbled but he also acknowleged he is a stronger student because of his experience in Calculus. He found the satisfaction of persevering to understand. He learned the benefit of going the extra mile to accomplish his goals. He learned it’s okay if he is not the smartest person in the room and how to learn from others. These were valuable lessons that will shape and mold his future far more than finding the area of a polar curve.
Parents, I can’t say this loud enough or often enough: “Allow your kids the joy of having a productive struggle!! Let them experience uncomfortable situations. It’s better if they learn to fail in your home where you can guide and support them through it.”
Christians, I can’t say this loud enough or often enough: “Just because we are His, doesn’t exempt us from struggles. Make those struggles productive. Learn from the struggle. Strengthen your faith muscles. Dive into deeper intimacy with God. While God is not the author of your pain, He can and will use it to sanctify and mature you.
Friends, be like NL. Don’t waste your struggle. Make it a productive struggle.
“So now, beloved ones, stand firm, stable, and enduring. Live your lives with an unshakable confidence. We know that we prosper and excel in every season by serving the Lord, because we are assured that our union with the Lord makes our labor productive with fruit that endures.”
1 Corinthians 15:58 TPT